AN AWFUL FIGHT
Yesterday we had an awful fight.
The kind that makes no sense.
The kind that dries your bones, exhausts your spirit and makes you want to curl up in a ball and sleep it away.
We don’t fight often so all fights feel awful but it was not fun, to say the least.
By the end we were completely drained, both of us hating how much we were on opposite sides and the fear of it all was engulfing the room.
Then the silence and embarrassment came and we were both so quick to hug and say sorries.
Later Shane looked at me and said “we should just get married again” and we both laughed because it was just that quiet recommitment that we needed.
The kind of recommitment you do everyday when you’re picking up their socks and putting away the never ending dishes, or taking out the trash when it feels like all you do. The kind of recommitment that reminds you that there’s more to it then just responsibilities. That we are still at the core. Two humans. Imperfect ones.
Because life and love is not a perfect story. It may look shiny and glowing from the outside looking in, but there are stresses and sadness we don’t always know.
But here’s what I do know - we love this life we are building and we love each other. We ARE human and we are also scared of failing. Sometimes we really suck at relationshipping. Sometimes we are really great at it. Yet every day I am thankful. Even on the days I’m dried to the bones, exhausted and drained from a silly fight.
Because the point isn’t to have a perfect story. The point is to write a real one that we both love.
So on we go, writing it.
A really, really great story.